Why is professional counseling always helpful before opting for surrogacy?

Surrogacy, as a medical alternative to bearing children, is yet to be thoroughly accepted by society. It is a blessing in disguise for infertile couples. However, not many people opt for it, due to lack of complete information about the process. Somewhere at the back of their minds, people worry about getting the custody of their child from the surrogate mother, legal battles they might have to fight if the transfer doesn’t go smoothly etc. It is here that professional counselling comes into play, as it guides the couple through the entire process and answers all their queries. Professional counselling also helps

Why is professional counselling advisable in cases of surrogacy?

This is a big process in your life and hence it is only natural to be confused when you are about to take such a huge leap. Professional counselling makes the process easier as you walk out with all your queries answered.

Some frequently asked queries about surrogacy.

Que1: The commonest worry on a couple’s mind is regarding the child having any blood relation with the surrogate mother.

Ans: The answer is No. There are various options of surrogacy available wherein both the egg and sperm belong to the couple itself or either the egg or sperm is acquired from an unknown donor or both the egg and sperm are acquired from donors at an infertility bank. In these cases, we see that the unborn child has no genetic relationship with the surrogate mother (gestational surrogacy). Few couples might opt for using the eggs from the surrogate mother; in such a case alone will the child born be related to the surrogate mother (traditional surrogacy).

Que2: Worries about the legal custody of the child.

Ans: The worries about who will have complete custody of the child are taken care of, as the surrogate mother doesn’t have any legal ownership of the child. They are also trained psychologically to remain detached from the unborn child, so when the child is born it is easy to let go. The counsellor guides about how you can convince your family members about this option, when is the right time to break the news to the family about the surrogate mother being pregnant with your child etc.

Que3:What is the time span to delivery in surrogacy?

Ans: The time span for surrogacy to delivery is around one and a half year as it depends on the time taken for the legal formalities and success of IVF treatment. If you wish, you can accompany the surrogate mother to all her doctor visits, ultrasounds, and even blood check-ups, so that you feel more connected to the baby and feel like a part of the entire process.

Que4: Will the couple feel detached from the baby?

Ans: Occasionally, the biological mother might feel detached from the baby as she has not actually given birth. Professional counselling helps in overcoming this feeling and instead, you will find yourself eagerly waiting to hold your baby in your hands. You will also be guided about the post-delivery relationship with the surrogate mother like, whether you would want your child to communicate with her, would you like to maintain a relationship with her etc.


These are some of the major questions that commonly arise in a couple’s mind and can be easily resolved by counselling with an experienced counsellor. Parenthood is a life-changing event in anyone’s life; it is highly recommended to opt for delaying the decision when in doubt.


Que1. How does a surrogate mother get pregnant?

Ans- A surrogate mother gets pregnant through in-vitro fertilization (IVF)

Que2. Is surrogate legal in India?

Ans- In December 2018 Indian surrogacy law was passed which made surrogacy illegal and only allows altruistic surrogacy for infertile and infertile couples

Que3. Who can opt for surrogacy?

Ans- According to the surrogacy bill passed only couples married for minimum 5 years can opt for surrogacy

Que4. Does a surrogate mother share blood with the baby?

Ans- A woman who carries someone else’s baby has very little to contribute.

Que5. Can a baby look like the surrogate mother?

Ans- If the surrogate contributes the egg in addition to carrying the baby then yes the baby can look like her and if different egg donor and sperm donor are used to creating the embryo the baby will look like these people.

Que6. Who has stronger genes?

Ans- Recent studies have found out that paternal genes are more dominant than maternal ones.

Que7. Which country is best for surrogacy?

Ans- Experts says that India and the US ranks the best for surrogacy

Que8.Can a woman fertilize her own egg?

Ans- A woman cannot fertilize her own egg without sperm.


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